Public Service Announcement #2
Attention: Anyone. Remember zip-off cargo pants? I do. There was a short while where they were all the rave with dorks, nerds and awkward folks for use in their everyday wardrobe.
I can see the benefit of these lightweight puppies for the outdoorsy folks. Sometimes hiking and camping, its necessary to pack light, so why not have a pair of pants that goes both ways (tee hee, both ways). When I’ve seen them in public, it was usually around campus. Typically I’d groan, but some guys had that outdoor, modern day Grizzly Adams look going on, except with Tevas and Nalgenes instead of moccasins and an ol’ timey water bladder. In those cases, I’d let it slide.
Today, downtown I came across something horrendous. Zip-off cargo pants and a neatly pressed oxford (tucked in, sleeves fully buttoned, etc) with a pair of loafers. Honestly I wanted to go up and slap this “gentlemen”. Was it a gift from his 3-year-old and he felt obligated to wear it? Was he going for a hike along the Erie Towpath Canal after work? Is he that out of touch?
So this is for you, crazy, hiking, lamer-than-FDR’s-legs, businessmen: Zip-off cargo pants is not acceptable business wear.