I found my purpose

Ben

I truly believe we all have a destiny in this world.

Something only one person, one unique human being, can do better than all others. This is what can be defined as a purpose, and I have just found mine.

That’s right, I think I would be a great candidate for “Natural Selection Speed Date II: Sugar Mamas & Boy Toys,” and here’s why:

  1. I’m mildly amusing, but not so much so that younger women find me attractive.
  2. I’m dorky enough to appear intelligent (sometimes) and repulse the 18-25 year old crowd.
  3. I’m not in terrible shape, but I’m not in great shape. Thus, whilst my rippling man-flesh is obviously appealing to a well-seasoned woman, it will not draw lecherous younger woman like flies to rotting meat.
  4. I’m quite confident that my wife would be happy renting me out for adequate compensation.
  5. I love the taste of Poly-dent.
  6. Three words: Olde Tyme Fun
  7. I can waltz.
  8. An older woman hit on me at the bar last week, so I’m in there like swim wear.
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2 responses to “I found my purpose”

  1. thegirlfromtheghetto says :

    Good look on securing a spot on the show!!! We cougars do love a younger man … well, I’m not really a cougar, but I applaud their efforts. It is nice to “meet” another Michigander.

  2. jimsey says :

    you only appear intelligent because of the glasses. Put on your weekend boxers and contacts while playing mario kart, and your as dumb as the rest of us.

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